Never Look Back Read online

  She clutched his shoulders, kneading the muscles.

  "Do that to my cock," he said.

  Stunned, Allie opened her eyes. "I didn't know you talked like that."

  "It's a word I have always used." He frowned a little. "Does it offend you?"

  "No. You just caught me off guard." Her heart wouldn't quit pounding. "I say it, too. I think it's sexy."

  "Then do it."

  She pushed past the waistband of his sweats and rubbed the tip, then the entire length, then back up. He wasn't circumcised. She could feel the natural shape, his foreskin gliding against her palm.

  This was new to her. She'd never touched an uncircumcised penis. But she liked it.

  "You need to take these off," she said. Her hand was still stuffed down his pants.

  He agreed, and within seconds, he was naked. Skin to skin, they kissed and caressed.

  Then he opened her thighs, lowered his head and licked her. Allie nearly flew off the bed. He was a voracious lover, just as she'd assumed he would be. He practically devoured her, slaking his thirst on the moisture between her legs.

  He glanced up, and she threaded her fingers through his hair. He kept arousing her, using his tongue. She couldn't hold on any longer. She convulsed, coming all over his mouth.

  When it ended, he rose up to kiss her. She wondered if Vanessa had been his first lover, if he'd been a virgin before he'd gotten married, a young man eager to explore his nocturnal cravings.

  She kissed him back, tasting her own orgasm. Whatever the case, he'd gotten damn good at it.

  "Your turn," she said, more than eager to reciprocate. She told him what position to take, knowing how badly he wanted it.

  He planted his knees on either side of her face. "Like this? Like the pictures we saw?"

  "Yes." Naughty boy, she thought. He brushed his cock against her lips.

  She closed her fingers around him and flicked her tongue. He exhaled an audible breath. He remained poised above her, watching everything she did.

  Finally she quit teasing him and took him in her mouth. He clutched the back of her head and rocked against her.

  In the soft-hued light, their gazes locked. This wasn't romance, she thought. This was down-and-dirty foreplay. But she was too enthralled with him to care. She sucked him hard and deep, making him moan.

  He pulled back before he came, telling her how good she'd made him feel, how he couldn't wait to be inside her.

  "I'm on the Pill," she said.

  He slid between her thighs. "What pill?"

  "Birth control."

  He entered her full hilt, and they made desperate love. The intensity overwhelmed her. It was more emotional than her fantasy, than what she'd imagined. But he hadn't been deprived of sex in her daydreams.

  He lifted her hips and moved inside her, letting the act consume him. She could see the century-old passion in his eyes, the need to take as much pleasure as he could get.

  Allie took her fill, too. All of him. Every copulating inch.

  She didn't climax again, but it didn't matter. He came strong and fast, spilling into her.

  The man who'd been cursed.

  The man she'd vowed to save.

  * * *

  There was no afterglow. No tender words. Allie and Raven lay side by side, cooling their naked bodies.

  The amber night-light melded with the floral-printed sheets. Hazy, she thought. Like a dream too distant to grasp.

  Only, this was real.

  Suddenly she wanted to cry. She wasn't sure why. Maybe she wanted him to hold her, to cuddle, to whisper endearments.

  "Are you sad?" he asked.

  "A little," she admitted.

  "Because sex with me confused you?"

  She tried to relax. How astute could he be? "It's a girly thing. I'll get over it."

  "It's better not to get too attached."

  She leaned on her elbow to look at him. "Why?"

  "Because I'm going to die."

  "Don't say that." She needed him to believe that he was going to survive, to not give up hope. "I keep telling you that I'm going to break the curse."

  "That won't keep me alive."

  "Yes, it will," she argued.

  "No, it won't. Breaking the curse will free me from the eternal torture Zinna intends to invoke, but I'll still die." He traced her jaw, as though memorizing the shape of her face. His first attempt at afterglow, of showing her that he cared. "Only I'll die in peace."

  "You can't know that, Raven."

  "It's what I feel."

  "You're not psychic."

  "A man knows what he knows, what is in his heart."

  Now she really wanted to cry. "I won't let you die."

  "You can't stop it." He took her in his arms and held her, close and warm against his body, giving her the kind of tenderness she'd wished for earlier.

  Only his embrace didn't comfort her. It simply made her more stubborn, more determined to prove him wrong.

  He nibbled her shoulder, and she smiled in spite of herself. But his playful behavior didn't last long. He let her go and moved away.

  Elusive as ever.

  "Vanessa and I used to do this," he said.

  "Do what?"

  "Talk. Be close at night."

  "Get more and more attached?"

  "Yes." He turned to study at her, his expression somber. "Have you ever been in love?"

  She shook her head. "No."

  "Not even a little?"

  "No." She considered his situation. "Is what they say true? Is it better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all?"

  "I don't know. Maybe not." He blew out a hard breath. "Vanessa died soon after I left."

  Allie pulled up the sheet. It was getting cold. Or maybe it was their conversation, his morguelike tone, the blanket-wrapped body in his mind.

  "How can you be sure?" she asked.

  "I could tell from the burial. Her family looked the same. They hadn't aged." He made a troubled face. "Why do you think my wife died so quickly?"

  "I don't know." What he'd seen in the mirror wasn't a fluke. It meant something. It was important. A piece of the puzzle she had to solve. "But I'll do my best to find out."

  "Thank you." He tipped her chin and kissed her.

  Deep and slow.

  Gratitude turned to passion, to sexual affection, to rubbing and touching. For Allie, it was a reminder of how fragile life was. No damn way was she going to let him die.

  "You won't feel badly about this afterward?" he asked.

  The sheet fell away. "No. I need it."

  "Me, too." He nudged her thighs apart. He was already hard.

  They tumbled over the bed, switching places. She took the lead, straddling his lap, riding him.

  They joined hands, their fingers locking. He arched his hips, meeting her generous rhythm.

  She thought about the curse that had brought him to this point. To her. To the great-granddaughter of the witch who'd punished him. Allie was sleeping with the man Zinna had wanted.

  "Poetic justice," she said, moving up and down, milking him with a warm, wet motion.

  He made a sensual sound, a low, satisfied groan. "What?"

  "Nothing." She leaned forward to capture his tongue. Her hair draped their bodies, falling like a curtain. She felt beautiful and sexy and wild, the way his wife must have felt every time she made love with him.

  Lucky Vanessa. Tragic Vanessa.

  When she tore her mouth away from his, ending the kiss, he tugged on her billowing hair, keeping her face close to his.

  "Don't stop," he whispered against her ear.

  "Kissing you?"

  "Fucking me."

  His words didn't shock her. She knew he was bold in bed. "Is that what I'm doing?"

  "Yes." He slipped his fingers between their bodies and stroked her.

  Sweet sensation.

  She did stop, just long enough to lose all reason, to catch her breath, to come.

  He watched h
er, his eyes dark and unyielding. She dug her nails into his shoulders, leaving marks on his skin. He flipped her over. He was on top again, pounding between her legs.

  But it felt good. Achingly, erotically good.

  * * *

  Allie woke up alone. She squinted into the dawn and saw Raven perched on a curtain rod.

  Her lover was a bird.

  She walked to the closet and put on a robe. The bed felt hollow without him. "You said it would happen by morning."

  He didn't react.

  The phone rang, jarring the stillness.

  She picked up the receiver and said hello. She didn't want to talk to anyone, but she couldn't bear the incessant ringing.

  "Allie, it's Daniel. I didn't call too early, did I?"

  "No, it's fine."

  "Your message from last night sounded important."

  "It was. It still is." She paused as Raven flew across the room. "Where were you?"

  "Working. Emergency surgery. Do you want to meet me at the zoo later?"

  "You're working today, too?"

  "No. I thought we could hang out there and talk. Make a day of it. I can get you in for free."

  She smiled. What Daniel was offering made her feel better. She hadn't been to the zoo since she was a child. "What time?"

  "How about ten? After I get back from church."

  Of course, she thought. It was Sunday. "Sounds good. I really need your help."

  "Don't worry about it. There isn't a lost artifact I can't find."

  "Thank you." She glanced at her lover. He landed on her pillow.

  Daniel said goodbye and the line went dead.

  She hung up the phone. Raven preened, shook himself and made a soft cooing sound.

  "You look handsome," she told him.

  He preened again.

  She gave him a sad smile. She wanted to pet him, but she never quite trusted him in this state. She could do without a bite.

  Suddenly a ghostly energy caught her attention.

  She spun around. She could sense the difference between ghosts and witches because of her father.

  "Dad?" she said, wondering if he would appear.

  Nothing happened. No filmy shadow. No transparent apparition.

  Raven cawed, and her heart pummeled her chest. His voice was loud.

  "I thought I felt someone," she told him.

  He started picking at the fancy borders on her pillowcase, loosening the crocheted edges, behaving like the restless bird he was.

  She looked around one more time for her dad.

  Nothing. No one.

  She tightened her robe, and the bird tore a hole in her pillowcase. Then he went after the one he'd used last night. "Thanks a lot."

  He mimicked a chuckle.

  She heaved a sigh. The mischief-maker was in full swing. "Are you hungry? I'll put something in the kitchen for you." She paused. Pink and gold threads were sticking out of his bill. "Don't destroy everything while I'm gone."

  She entered the kitchen, where Samantha circled her feet, meowing for her meal. Allie grabbed a bagel for herself and put food out for both animals.

  Before long, Raven showed up to get his share and began bugging the cat for attention. She annoyed him right back, making the usual game of it.

  If he died, Sam would miss him.

  Allie would, too.

  She held her hand against her heart, feeling like a half-formed butterfly in a squashed cocoon.

  She needed to get a grip on her emotions.

  After she returned to her bedroom, the ghostly energy came back. Only she knew it wasn't her dad.

  An herbal-soft scent wafted through the air, like a holistic fragrance a female might wear.

  Beautiful. Haunting.

  Tragic, she thought. Like Raven's wife.

  "Are you Vanessa?" she asked.

  The scent faded, and the room turned bone cold.

  "Fine. Be that way." She rubbed the goose bumps on her arms.

  Determined to shake the claws of death, Allie soaked in the tub and got ready for the zoo, choosing a pair of trendy jeans and a T-shirt decorated with hand-painted flowers. She added a few baubles, antique jewelry she'd unearthed at a consignment store.

  When the time came for her to leave the loft, she walked down the stairs and took the path that led to the parking structure behind the building.

  She approached her car, then stopped in her tracks. She smelled the herbal fragrance again.

  And knew the lady ghost was following her.

  Chapter 8

  Once Allie got in her car, the fragrance dissipated into nothingness. So she drove to the zoo, wondering if the ghost was struggling to make contact.

  And now she sat on a bench with Daniel near the chimpanzee exhibit. He all but gaped at her. She'd told him about Raven, his past, his future, his connection to the amulet.

  "You don't believe me, do you?" she asked.

  "Would you believe you if you were me?" came the quick reply.

  She sighed. She needed Daniel's help. She needed him on her team. "Kyle and Joyce believe me."

  His glasses glared in the sunlight, making him squint. "Kyle's a great guy, but he's always been a little strange."

  Look who was calling the kettle black, she thought. There sat Daniel, with his sculpted muscles and nerdy vibe. Just like the last time she'd seen him, he wore a pair of jeans he'd ironed, and his Brylcreemed hair was combed strategically away from his face. She wondered if he and Kyle had enlisted in the military together and if they'd spent the same tour in Desert Storm.

  "Witchcraft is real," she said.

  "I didn't say it wasn't."

  "Then why don't you believe me?"

  "Does it matter?" He removed his glasses and cleaned them on the hem of a polo-style shirt. "I'm still going to help you."

  Yes, it mattered. But she would accept his guidance either way. He gazed at her, and she was struck by how compelling he looked without the horn-rims.

  He was a shape-shifter, too.

  "So where do we start?" she asked.

  "To research the amulet?" He fitted the black glasses into place, and the quasi-nerd was back. "I'll take you to see one of my contacts."

  "Thanks." She glanced at the chimpanzees. An animated couple was holding hands, like best friends on a playground. Others were romping around the exhibit or grooming each other. "Who's your contact? Who are we going to go see?"

  "A woman," he responded.

  A mysterious woman, she thought. He didn't offer a name or a description, no background information, nothing to identify her. And then Allie's intuition kicked in. "Is she your lover?"

  He frowned at her.

  "Former lover?"

  Another frown. A telltale sign that Allie was right.

  "Does it matter? You're sleeping with Raven."

  "I thought you didn't believe he was real."

  "I don't."

  "Then does it matter?" she said, tossing the phrase of the day back in his face.

  He didn't respond. By now he was engrossed in the chimps, in the handholding pair.

  She watched them, too. "I was going to set you up with one my friends."

  He turned away from the primates. "I don't need your charity. I can get dates on my own."

  "I didn't mean it that way."

  His expression softened. "I'd rather go out with you."

  She almost touched him, almost put her hand on his knee. But consoling him didn't seem like the right thing to do. "I already have a lover."

  "A man who keeps turning into a bird. A raven," he said. "A trickster. This whole thing feels like a trick. You confuse me, Allie."

  Her emotions tangled. Raven had said that to her, too. "I think you'd like him."

  "What you told me about his life seems sad. Why would you create such a tortured guy?"

  "I didn't create him." She met his glasses-shielded gaze. At the moment he seemed tortured, too. "I can't believe I'm having this effect on you. Or on Raven. Men never re
act to me this strongly."

  "Then maybe I would like him." Daniel gave it up and grinned. "Maybe I'm part raven, too."

  More like part superhero, she thought. He flew with a crusader's cape, not with a pair of midnight wings. But he flew just the same. "You're a good guy."

  "Gee, thanks." He leaned in close. "Haven't you heard that nice guys finish last?"

  His proximity made her smile. Sweet, goofy Daniel. "I said good, not nice."

  He waggled his brows. It made him look like Groucho Marx. "I'm good in bed."

  "Are you?" Curious, she studied him, wondering what kind of lover he was. "Maybe I'll ask your contact about that."

  "Go ahead," he challenged.

  Allie caught herself. What was she doing? Flirting? Getting drawn to Daniel? "I don't think this is a conversation we should be having."

  They both fell silent, awkward as could be. He cleared his throat, and she told herself to move away from him. Only she didn't. She stayed right there.

  Close to him.

  "They're kissing," he said.

  She blinked. "What?"

  "The chimps."

  She followed his line of sight. The handholding couple were smacking their lips together. Innocent. Sweet. Friendly.

  Allie dared a glance at her companion, anxiety spiking her pulse. Was she latching onto Daniel because she was afraid of losing Raven?

  He broke the tension. "Do you want an ice cream or something?"

  "Sure."

  They walked to the nearest vendor, and he bought her soft-serve vanilla in a sugar cone. He got one, too, and they licked their treats like a couple of carefree kids.

  But it was an illusion. Their minds were troubled.

  "What do you do?" he asked. "Besides paint magic pictures?"

  "I teach art classes at a senior citizens' community center. But my next class doesn't start until March."

  "I'll bet the elders are crazy about you."

  "I'm crazy about them, too." She watched the people walking by and noticed that they were young, old and in between. The zoo was crowded on this sunny Sunday morning. "Did I tell you about the ghost?"

  "Your dad?"

  "No. Another ghost." She glanced at a thirty-something couple buying snacks for their kids. "I think it's Raven's wife."

  "Damn." Daniel ate down to the cone. "Is everything in your life supernatural?"

  "It seems to be."

  "Where did she appear to you?"